September 17, 2001
Allright
Applaud me. Not only did I change out of my pajamas today, I showered. And combed my hair. And put on deodorant.
I smell nice.
I can't preserve the morning after. He is gone. But there is a calm inside me, a subdued waiting feeling.
I remember reading somewhere that women wait, that it is always the situation we find ourselves in. I don't think that is necessarily true. It should have been that love waits, or devotion waits. There may be a time when he will also have to wait for me, for I have dreams to fulfill also.
I was writing to myself last night in the glow of twelve a.m., musing softly my future. I cannot have the beauty of yesterday, but that does not mean that tomorrow cannot also be beautiful. There is so much left for us to share.
I hope I am only given the chance.
And to a friend, I feel better knowing that I am not the only person to feel this way, not by far the first or only.
He whispered softly in my ear, stroking my hair, "It'll be allright..."
I believe you.
astera at clad