April 20, 2002
Jill Needs A Hug
Help. I am having the absolute most impossible time with this bastard layout. I can't change it. Nothing looks good. As a matter of fact, everything looks like shit. Even the pictures in my head aren't all that great, so it can only be expected that after my tampering with them in my sad excuse for an image program and subsequently inserting them into my poorly constructed html, they'll look like shit. I can't even manage professional shit.
So if anyone has a decent muse at their disposal, seeing as mine is fucking wasted out of her mind lately, leave me a note. I need all the help I can get.
How often do I say I cannot keep the sighs from my throat? Well, this is another one of those days.
Have no more information about flaming car. I was hoping it would be on the news, but it wasn't. Chances are I will never know.
My whole body aches. On top of working the most difficult stations last night (as in, those that are furthest from the front of the house), I also walked all the way into town to the library and back yesterday morning. Likely about two miles each way. My legs and lower back are killing me. I stretch to no avail.
I am just exasperated with everyone and everything right now. Stupid Busboy Justin at work plagues me. I like him, he's a nice guy, but he seems to still be hung up on this whole me-going-out-with-him thing. Yesterday he asked me for a picture of myself, several times, despite my initial and continuing refusal.
I'm just ready to go to school where I can hopefully meet someone who isn't half retarded.
I said hello to Brandon, and we exchanged tight lipped smiles halfway through the night. Who knows about him. Who cares. Boys suck.
I'm really not in all that sour of a mood, I'm just tired. I'm ready to start school, to feel like I am doing something with my life. Whatever this is I am living right now, it's certainly not that.
And stupid ass Ryan is down in Texas is fucking all kinds of girls. I don't care for my sake, I'm just disappointed. I thought he was a better person than that.
I should have known.
astera at 12:44 p.m.