April 9, 2001
Disney Exposed
Walt Disney was insane. I've been reflecting lately, mostly on worthless (but funny!) nonsense, and I got to thinking about The Little Mermaid...
Okay, for starters, King Triton is supposed to be bad-ass. I mean, he has the big stick and the magestic Santa-esque beard. And yet he allows Ursula to turn his faithfull denizens into little sea-coral-muddy creatures just for pure, unadulterated, villainous fun. Doesn't he notice the missing mer-people? Shit, there had to be hundreds. Has he no police force? Why isn't that woman paying for her heinous crimes?
And Cruella De Ville. The woman makes coats (and various other stylish garments) out of animal skins. Where the hell was P.E.T.A.?
Let's take the true Disney creations. Mickey Mouse wears pants, but no shirt. And Donald wears a shirt but no pants. And yet, you will note (as I'm sure you all have), that when Donald gets out of the shower he wraps a towel around his waist. Why the sudden modesty?
Aladdin. You have the totally inept Sultan verses crafty, sadistic Jafar. Not only is Jafar infinetely more intelligent than the Sultan, he also has magic on his side. Does it never occur to him to just knock off the fat man and take over? It must be Iago. Who said you can trust a parrot?
Now Cinderella, there is a girl who is can't even aspire to be the dullest knife in the drawer. She is practically enslaved to her Step Mother and it never crosses her mind to just run away? I mean, seriously, go become a bar wench or something. She can take the mice, too, if they mean that much to her. But maybe not Gus. Bar wenching doesn't pay very well.
astera at sure, why not